Yesterday, I had a VIPG -- a Very Important Pickleball Game. Our team made the playoffs, whoo hoo!
I was talking to Pedro about it and I said I didn't think we'd make the finals after this round.
"Mom," he said, "you are a fucking adult. You don't play for fun. You play to win."
Right. I am going to have to figure that out.
And we did win, which is very cool. Our team won the playoffs last season, which was exciting, and also like not that exciting at the same time. Of course, it was nice to win, but the thrill wore off after thirty minutes. The ego loved it, but then the ego's happiness shelf-life is short before it looks for the next shiny new thing. Yet, I suppose winning is better than losing? I dunno.
Winning and losing is relatively new to me. As I've mentioned before, the only time I've every played competitive team sports was one infamous season of Cardinal Booster soccer in middle school. Soccer looks easy, right? You just run around and kick the ball. How hard can it be?
It was awful. I was the worst person on the team and I couldn't wait for the whole experience to be over. I was also disappointed that someone who was twelve had passed her prime and couldn't pick up a new sport without being drowned out by other kids who had been playing since they were six. There is seriously something wrong with the world that didn't allow a pre-teen to be a beginner at something.
So here I am again, trying something new, but having a better experience. Pickleball is a relatively new sport, so almost everyone is new to it. With the exception of a handful of people from Bainbridge, no one my age has played pickleball since they were a kid.
The biggest learning I am taking away from this experience: being the weak link or the worst person on the team. Our team captain has a strategy of pairing the best players together and the weakest together. Her idea is that out of the nine games (three games played by three pairs), the strong pairs will win three out of three for six victories out of nine. If the weak team loses by ten points or two, it doesn't matter if the other teams' victories are decisive.
I was re-reading my blog posts and I've seen how far I have come since the fall. Back then, I half of my serves were out of bounds. Now, I'll get one serve out of bounds in three games, a dramatic improvement. Once I became reasonably competent, I was terrified of losing, thinking it was my fault. I'd replay missed shots in my mind.
Now, I am okay with where I am at. I also know that my goal is to improve my skills, not just win. If I focus on winning, I am giving too much power to my opponents. I can't be depressed or sad if I lose to a pair that is better than I am. How can I get better if I only play people I can beat?
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