Pooped

Sunday's Exercise: Jack and I biked 16.4 miles on the road, not on the stationary bike.

I am pooped. I am tired and I don't know why. Maybe I am anemic. Maybe I was zapped by the heat last weekend or the change in weather. Maybe I am exercising too much, or maybe too little. Maybe I am tired from the trip and my jet lag is still lingering. Maybe I am getting old. At PT today, I asked Jason if my knee was stiff because I was working too hard or not enough.

"Yeah, that can happen," he said. Even the pros don't know.

I am tired of my knee not being normal and I am sick of doing my physical therapy exercises. In three days, I'll be six months out from the surgery. I long to be normal where I don't have a list of exercises I need to do every single day.

I sound like a whiny teenager. Forgive me.

I confessed to Evan on Friday that I did none of my physical therapy exercises while I was on vacation.

"That's the first time I've heard that," he said.

"Are you serious or sarcastic?" I asked, not able to tell the difference.

"No one does their exercises on vacation," he said.

"I was so tired when we came back at the end of the day, I wanted to collapse into bed and be horizontal. I was too tired to do all of those exercises after being on my feet all day."

"I am not too worried," he said. "You probably did more on a vacation day than you do on a regular day."

Still, I am tired of doing my exercises. I just want a break from it. If I didn't see these guys twice a week, I might not do anything.

Or maybe I'd go crazy. Next week, I start going to PT once a week instead of twice a week. I saw my friend Armando running on the treadmill Friday, and I thought "I need to be doing that." Armando is a professional athlete, and exercising is his job. But still, I wish I could run. I need to be able to run before I stop PT. I have this sense if I stop PT before I can run, then I might not every be able to run at all. Plus I'll need to pass the test for skiing, whatever that is.

I met with Jason this morning and asked what I needed to do before they would put me on the treadmill. He gave me the list which includes single leg squats and single leg jumps. I can do double leg jumps (yay! go me!) but gravity is my enemy when it comes to single leg jumps. Shortly after the surgery, I had the goal of getting out of the brace, then normalizing my gait. Now I have a goal to run, I am happy. I have a reason to keep up with the exercises.

I hope. I am still really tired.