Happy Children?

I wonder what is means when people say they want their children to be happy.  Are they hoping for a state of being for their children, or a personality trait?

Some kids (and adults) are naturally jovial.  They are in a good mood and are pleasant to be around.  I would assume most of these people are happy.   Think of Mr. Bingley in Pride and Prejudice, the man who eventually marries Elizabeth Bennett's older sister, Jane.  He is a happy-go-lucky guy.  His happiness is a personality trait.

Now think of Mr. Darcy: moody, brooding, sensitive.  Is he happy?  Is he capable of being happy?  He will never be a jolly fellow, but is there a problem with that?  Do you think Elizabeth Bennet would want to be married to someone as carefree as Mr. Bingley?  No.  The world needs the likes of Mr. Darcy, especially the new and improved kind who arrives at the end of the book.  We need people who worry about things and solve problems.

So do we really want our kids to be happy?  Aren't they happy when they get a new toy, are loaded with sugar, and zoned out after playing video games for hours?  Reasonable moms (with the exception of the likes of Aunt Petunia in Harry Potter) would cringe at the thought of letting their kids live in such a state of spoilage.  Reasonable moms set limits.  You save your money if you want that toy.  Dessert is for after dinner.  And, You can play video games for x amount of time after you finish your homework and chores.

Instead, would we prefer they have a sense of accomplishment?  A sense of peace, responsibility, and the feeling of loving and being loved in return?  Engaged and curious about the world?

Or should we ask the kids what they want?