#selfcare, or Retail Therapy

As you may know from yesterday's post, I was feeling blue this weekend. To perk myself up, I did a few things.

Fabric Shopping. I saw this packet of fabric and decided to add it to my stash. Now I need to figure out a new quilting project.

Fixed my favorite sweater jacket that is falling apart. The cuffs on my green Ibex are frayed. I used scrap ribbons to hide the split seams. I am halfway done. Now it has a 1970's disco/Mork and Mindy vibe going for it.

Window Shopping. I visited Isadora's, an antique and vintage jewelry store, yesterday. I spent an hour trying on rings and earrings. Yeah. Nice stuff. The sales woman was a hoot. One of the great things about retail therapy here was that I didn't need to buy anything to feel better.

This one is from circa 1920. 2.8 carats of diamonds surround the massive aquamarine stone.

I have been working hard to figure out my own behavior lately in terms of how I reacted and responded to the years of Jack being pre-occupied with work. As a result, I was left in a one-sided marriage. As I continue to excavate my feelings about this, I am grieving the loss of those years where I could have been in a mutual and reciprocating marriage or relationship. I am also working to ensure I don't end up in a similar relationship again through my own misguided attempts to try to fix things that cannot be fixed.

The challenge of codependency is that it is natural for at least half of humanity to want to be helpful, as parents and partners. The challenge comes when we overstep other's boundaries, or an addiction makes a child or partner unable to respond to insights from others. I am slowly trying to figure out balance here.