Snow White Privilege

I love to shovel snow. I know I am weird, but shoveling snow is one of my most favorite outdoor chores. Yesterday morning, I went out to get my newspaper and I saw one of the officers of the HOA (Home Owner's Association) outside shoveling a path through the courtyard. I said hello and said I'd be willing to help after I got back from the Market. Plus, I needed to take pictures of all of the snow in downtown Seattle, because that is what Seattlites do -- we take pictures of snow like we have never seen it before even though half of the town skis every weekend in the winter because the snowy mountains are better than the city's cold, gray drizzle.

I digress. So today I decided to shovel again. The courtyard stairs were still full of snow, so I was shoveling them. A few people walked by and thanked me for shoveling. This one couple--whom I did not know--saw my shoveling the steps. They needed to go down the stairs to get to the garage. 

"Excuse me," they said, waiting for me to stop shoveling so I could let them pass. Their tone had a little ahem to it, as if I did not know that it was my role to let them pass. In fact, they seemed mildly disgruntled that they had to interrupt me. I was kind of annoyed and then I figured it out: they thought I was the help.

Oy.

Oy. Oy. Oy.

I was pissed. I continued shoveling, and for two seconds I thought about flipping a heavy, wet load of snow over the edge of the stairwell, maybe splashing them on the head. But they were already gone, so my potential act of aggressive-passive-aggression never came to fruition. Besides, that would have been mean.

Then, I had an even funnier thought: what if I did throw the snow over the stairs and plopped them on the head. What if they threatened to have me fired? I would have been happy to tell them my name and have them go to the building manager to "fire me." I can visualize the building manager explaining to them that I live there. Wouldn't that have been hilarious?

So funny.

Except when it isn't. Here I am--a white woman who lives in a pretty posh downtown condo getting pissed off because some people treated me rudely because they thought I was the help. I had a nice little revenge fantasy going, which is fine. Sure, I have faced a decent amount of gender discrimination, but I don't have to deal with micro-aggressions or other assumptions on a daily basis. I probably haven't dealt with any crap like that ever. Okay, once when I was in college I was working my summer job at the deli. It was a cool morning and I was wearing my Northwestern University sweatshirt. One of the usual patrons came and started to tell me all about Northwestern: that it was in Evanston, Illinois, that it was on Lake Michigan, that it was such as good school, blah, blah, blah. I let him carry on, and then I said,

"Yeah I know. I go to school there."

He stopped talking. I don't think I ever saw him again back at the deli. He might have been too embarrassed. 

So, once every few decades I have to deal with insensitive douche-bags not having common courtesy.

Other people have to deal with that kind of shit on a daily basis, where someone makes an assumption about them because of their race, gender and/or ethnicity. One of my Indian co-workers picked me up at the airport. The parking patrol woman thought he was an Uber driver and told him to move along. 

"Uber drivers can't park here," the parking lady said.

"I'm not an Uber driver," he said. "I'm picking up a friend," he said. Then, I show up, a middle-aged white woman with a laptop case and the parking lady probably thought "Yeah, he's an Uber driver for sure."

I can't imagine having to deal with that crap all of the time. It would suck. 

I guess the point is: if you are a racist or sexist or snob or classist or whatever, be courteous and civil and kind to everyone you meet anyway. This way people won't have to feel your racism, sexism, or classism. I have a Jewish friend who wants to know upfront who is anti-Semetic. I can understand his perspective, but maybe if people were kind--even if they had to pretend they were nice, their racism/sexism/classism might eventually fade. They might forget they were a racist/sexist/classist in the first place.