The Woman on the Plane

I was having a hard evening after a difficult call with the Boy this morning. He is coming into some of the deep and difficult part of his work and it is hard for me as his mom to hear. It is just as hard to be told that I shouldn't try to rescue him, and tell that people really do like him and he does have friends.

So I called my dad, who is the greatest guy on the planet. My mom has Alzheimer's. She has lived in a memory care unit for four years, and my dad visits her every day and feeds her lunch. He is devoted. My mom can't communicate, and while he loves her, he often wishes he had more engaging companionship.

My dad asked me if my mom ever told me how my parents got together. My mom had told me when I was a little girl, but I had never heard the story from my dad's side. My mom had been dating this guy who was friends with my dad. My mom and her then boyfriend often double-dated with my dad and "whatever chick your father was dating at the time."

My mom's boyfriend had moved to St. Louis, and my mom and dad flew down from Chicago to visit him. On the flight home, my parents talked.

"She looked at me with these googly eyes and told me the only reason she was dating this other guy was to hang out with me. She liked that I wore glasses. She liked the way I stood," my dad said. He was moved talking about this, remembering what she was like decades ago.

"I remember that, the beginning. I was so touched that she said all of these nice things about me," my dad said. "I'd give anything be on that plane again."

"I'd do it all over again, everything," he said. "Sometimes when I am at the nursing home feeding her, I still see the woman on the plane."