Art & Crafts

The last time I had surgery and went under general anesthesia, I had this fear I was going to die: I could possibly die while unconscious, and then die of boredom during recovery (assuming I survived the operation.)

I thwarted death then, but here I am facing surgery today.

I've known about this surgery for a few weeks, and since then I've been busy getting ready. I was talking to my manager at work, I told him most of the stress has been trying to take care of things to support myself while I live alone. I have a string of friends lined up to help me during and after the surgery, and I am grateful for their support. 

Nevertheless, I have been cleaning my condo like I have OCD for the past three weeks. I mean no disrespect to people who actually suffer from OCD, but I had a small window in what it must be like to want to quote Allie Brosh "clean all the things" all the time. I've become an evangelist for eCloth, which has a collection of microfiber cloths where you can clean without chemicals. (Think no Windex or SoftScrub.) I've washed my interior windows and cleaned the fridge and the inside of the microwave oven. All towels and sheets are clean.

When I was recovering from my torn ACL, I read constantly, mostly novels. I read at least three books a week. I finished one book in less than 24 hours. Now for this surgery, my attention is turned to crafts. I have needlepoint, embroidery and felting projects galore. I have at least a hundred hours of activities. As my friend Linda said when I was purchasing a pillow cover to felt, "This guarantees you a three day recovery." I'll take it.

I have my post-op activities ready to, but surgery is also a good incentive to cross of things on my bucket list. Ever since I've taken art history classes in college, I've wanted to collect art. I am not talking fancy or extravagantly expensive paintings by famous artists, or bidding on things at Sotheby's. I just want nice things to hang on my walls, that mean something to me.

It has been a rough few months, with my mother's death and dying, my dad being hospitalized, my divorce being finalized and my need to for surgery.

So I have bought a few paintings, that are just my own. I didn't need to ask permission to buy them, and I didn't need to collaborate with anyone to see if we should get them. These are things that speak to me, and they are only my decision. Might I get sick of a painting after a bit? Maybe. Then I can change things up.

What I have learned more in the past few months that except for death, nothing is permanent. We may try to keep things as they are, but things change. We evolve. The only thing we can do is be present in the moment.